New Punjabi Jokes And Chutkule |Very Funny Jokes For Whatsapp And Facebook Share With Friends
Funny Punjabi Jokes
Wife To Husband: Tumhe Pyar Karna Nahi Aata.
Husband: To Kya Ye Bachhe Internet Se Download Kiye Hain???
Wife: Nahi Eh Tan Singh Sahab De Pen Drive To Litte Ne.
Custmer: Teri Majh Di 1 Akh Ta Khrab Hai, Fer V Tu Isde 25 Hzar Rupye Mang
Reha Hai.
Santa: Tenu Majh Dudh Peen Layi Chahidi Hai Ya Nain-Matakka Karn
Layi…
Kudi Bust Stop Te Khadi, Mobile Te Gallan Kar Rahi Si,
Boy Ohnu Comment Karda Hai: Haye! Kash Main Mobile Hunda, Teriyan Gaallan (Chicks) Naal Lagya Hunda…
Kudi: Haan, Fer Main Ghar Jaa Ke Charger Teri *$%*& Ch Laundi…
Ikk Bohta Kale Rang Da Master Ik Jattan De Jawak Nu Bolya, Main Kal Eh Padhaya Si Ke,
Sadda Shareer Kis-Kis Cheez Naal Banya Hunda Hai?
Chal Hun Tu Dass?
Jawak: Ik Pani Ton, Ik Hawa Ton, Te Ik….
Jawak Master Nu Ik Maar Dekhan Lag Gya,
Master: Te Hor Kis Cheez Naal???
Jawak: Ik Tarkol Naal… 😀
Santa: Oye Tenu Pta Hai Sarkaar Ne Chaar Aane Band Kar Dite Hai?
Banta: O Kyun Santa Oye Sarkaar Kolo Ek Anna (Hazzare) Nhi Sambhalya Jaa
Rhea Te O Chaar Aane Kivein Sambhalegi…
Rabb Ne Tiwi Nu Sunder Banaya
Khoobsurat Dimaag Vi Diya
Hirni Jehi Aakhan Deyi
Gulab Jehe Honth
Pyar Bharya Dil Ditta
Te Fer Jubaan Deke Sab Te Pani Fer Ditta…
Ek Amli Te Ek Janani Bus Ch Chadh De Han
Bus Puri Tra Full Hundi A Amli Aapne Nal Bhang Le Ke Aaya C Te Janani Ik Bag.
Bus Full Hon Karke Oh Bhang Te Bag Taki Kol Rakh Dende Han.
Conductor Aanda Hai, Te Amli Nu Kehenda Hai, “Oye Eh Bhang-Phosdha Keehda Aa”.
Amli Jabab Denda Hai, Jee Bhang Ta Meri A Phosdha Eh Bibi Da Wa
Ik Tiwi Apne 6 Baccheya De Naal Rail Vich Sawar Hoyi,
Sammne Ik Budda Bidi Pee Reha Si,
Bidi Naal Tiwi Disturb Ho Ke Boli, Please Cigrate Peena Band Kar Do,
Apne Samne Nahi Padh Sakde, Bidi-Cigrate Peena Mana Hai!
Budha: Madam, Main Tan Padh Lawanga, Pehlan Tu Taan Padh Lai Apne Saamne,
Board Te Likhya Hai, Bacche Do Hi Acche!
Jadugar To Santa: Hum Main Teri Votti De Do Hisse Kar Davanga…
Santa: Kidda Diya Galla Karda Bai, Mere Ko Ik Ni Sambh Hundi, Tu Meri Problem Nu Double Karn Te Tulya E…
1 Aalu Ne Bhindi K Number Pe I Love U Ka Msg Beja,
Bhindi Ne Use Phone Kar K Bura Bhala Kaha Aur Boli,
Shut Up, Tum Itne Mote Aur Main Slim And Smart,
Aalu Ko Bahut Dukh Hua Aur Us Ne Phir Itni Sabziyan Fasaayi Ki Aaj Aap
Dekh Skte Ho,
Aalu-Ghobi,
Aalu- Bengan,
Aalu-Shimla Mirch,
Aalu-Palak,
Aalu-Matar,
Aalu-Gajar
Aur Bindhi Us Din Se Aaj Tak Akeli H,
Moral: Mat Kar Itna Gurur Surat Par Ae Haseena.
Banta: Sante Aa Tu Nai Scootery Kado Liandi?,
Santa: Yaar Main Ik Kudi To Lift Mangi, O Mainu Kujh Door Leja K Kapde Lah
Ke Kendi Jo Lena Ae Lai Lo…
Banta: Phir Tu Ki Kita,
Santa: Main Scootery Lai Aandi.
Ik Sarabi Pati Apni Patni Nu Phone Karda Hai,
Pati: Aaj Main Ghar Nahi Aa Sakda,
Patni: Kyo?
Pati: Meri Car Da Stering Ate Gair Chori Ho Gye Ne,
Thori Der Bad Pati Fir Phone Karda Hai,
Pati : Main Ghar Aa Riha Haa,
Patni: Hune Ta Tusi Mana Karde Pai C,
PatiL O Main Galti Naal Picchli Seet Te Beh Giya C…
Unknown Call:
He: Hey! Hello! Does U Have A Bf?
SHE: Yes! Who R U?
HE: Tera Bhai… Ruk Kamini Ghar Ata Hun Teri Dhulai Karne.
Another UNKNOWN CALL:
HE: Hello! Do U Have A BF?
SHE: Ohh! No No I Dont Have.. Who R U?
HE: Im Ur BF Cheat U Broke Mah Heart.
SHE: Oh Darling Sorry I Thought U R My Brother!
HE: Kamini.. Tera Bhai Hi Hu..
Aaj To Bas Ghar Aane Ki Der Hai Tu Nahi Bachegi!
– Navdeep
Frogs Chatting…
Frog 1 -Tur
Frog 2 -TurTur
Frog 1 -TurTurTur
Frog 2-TurTurTurTur
Frog 1-Tur Tur Tur
Frog 2-KUR KUR KUR
Frog1 – Kann Te Marni Main Chaped, Topic Change Na Kar… Tur Tur Tur.. :P
Shunty:rab Mainu I Nottan Naal Bhariya Ghar De De!
Pappu :Rab Mainu 1 Chandi Da Ghar De De !
Bunty :Rab Mainu 1 Sone Da Ghar De De !
Pinku :Rab Mainu En 3na De Ghar Di Chaabi De Dyi.
Ik Munda Ik Kudi De Piche Kafi Der Ton Ja Reha Si,
Kudi: Ve Tenu Samaj Nai Aundi, Teri Maut Ae Tenu Ajj Bula Rahi,
Tenu Darr Nai Lagda Meri Bebe Vi Piche-Piche Aa Rahi,
Munda: Assi Aashiq Ha Khandaani, Sade Bajurg Vi Apna Farz Nibha RaheNe,
Fikar Na Kar Teri Bebe Piche Sade Bapu Hori Vi Aa Rahe Ne
Santa: Jad Mera Nava-Nava Viah Hoya Si Tan Menu Meri Voti Aini Changi Lagdi Hundi Si Ke Dil Karda Si Ke Ohnu Kha Hi Jawa…
Banta: Te Hun Kidda Lagda E?
Santa: Hun Na Puch Yaar, Hun Lagda E Ke Je Khaa Janda Tan Mere Tidd Ch Dard Ho Jana Si…
SANTA Ek Bar Beach Par Gaya To Lok Us Se Push Ne Lage Ki,
ARE YOU RELAXING?
Aur SANTA Bola Ki NO I AM SANTA.
To SANTE Ne Dekha Ki Ek Admi Ro Raha Tha To SANTE Ne Kaha Ki,
ARE YOU RELAXING?
Aur Admi Ne Kaha Ki YES, I AM RELAXING To SANTE Ne Jor Se
Uske Gaal Par Thappad Mareya?
Aur Admi Ne Kaha Ki WHY ARE YOU SLAPING ME?
Aur Sante Ne Kaha Ki Sari Beach Par Lok Tujhe Dund Rehe He Aur Tu Yaha
Betha Hai?
Costumer Raat Nu Hotel Vich Ja Ke Waiter Nu Kehnda: Surili Jehi Chah
Bana Ke Lya, Miss Pooja Vargi.
Waiter: Sir, Ethe Majh Da Dudh Milda Miss Pooja Da Ni.
Girl: Tusi Bada Sohna Gaaunde Ho,
Boy: Main Sunya Tusi Vi Bada Sohna Gaa Lainde Ho,
Girl: Oh Tan Main Bas Bathroom Singer Han,
Boy: Tan Fer Kadi Bulao Othe Hi Mehfil Lavange. 😉
Ik Munda Te Kudi Park Ch Ik Darkhat De Piche Lukke Baithe Si,
Ik Bujarg Aa Ke Kehenda: Beta Kya Ye Hamari Sanskiriti Hai?
Munda: Na Na Uncle Jee, Eh Tan Pooja Haigi, Tusi Kise Hor Pede The Pichhe Labh Lo…