New Punjabi Jokes And Chutkule |Very Funny Jokes For Whatsapp And Facebook Share With Friends
Funny Punjabi Jokes
Ek Bhikari Ne Bus Stop Te Khade Bande Nu Keha,
“Sahab 2 Din Ton Bhukha Waan, Main 5 Rupeye De Do, Roti Khan Vaste.”
Banda Boleya, “Tamatar Khao!”
Bhikhari Thoda Hairan Hoke Kehan Lagga Sir, Roti Sasti Hai, Tamatar 40 Rupeye Kilo Ne.
Banda Fer Boleya, “Tamatar Khao!”
Bhikari, “Theek Hai Janab Fer Tamatar Vaste Hi De Davo 5 Rupeye.”
Banda Fer Gusse Ch Boleya, “Apna Tamatar Khao!”
Kol Khadeya Banda, Bhikhari Nu Boleya, “Eh Banda Tottala Hai, Eh Keh Reha Hai Ke, Kama Kar Khao.”
Ik Premi Ohdi Premika Nu, “Tainu Dekhde Hi Meri Nashaa Ch Khoon Dauran Lag Painda Hai,
Akhan Ch Ajeeb Jehi Garmi Aa Jaandi Hai,
Sara Sareer Kamban Ja Lag Jaanda Hai Te Mera Dil Jor Jor Di Dhadkada Hai.”
Premika: “Tu Taan Yaar, Lagda Koi Heart Da Mareej Takkar Geya Mainu.”
Ek Sohni Kudi Ne Bada Nive Cut Da Blouse Paya Hoya Si,
Te Utte Gall Ch Hawai Jhaaj Da Loket Ghum Reha Si,
Ik Munda Bade Dhyaan Naal Dekhan Lag Peya,
Kudi Sharma Ji Gayi, Te Kehan Lagi, “Lagta Hai Tusi Kade Hawai Jahaj Nahi Dekhya?”
Munda Kehnda, “Hawai Jhaaj Taan Bade Dekhe Ne, Per Eho Jeha Airport Ni Dekhya?”
Santa: Tuhada Kutta Tan Sher Varga Ho Geya, Ki Khwande Ho Ehnu?
Banta: Oye, Eh Sher Hi Hai, Sala Pyar, Pyur De Chakkaran Ch Pai Geya, Sakhal Kutte Jehi Ho Gayi Ae.
😀
Golden Words By Hitler:
If You Can Not Fly, Run.
If You Can Not Run, Walk.
If You Can Not Walk, Crawl.
But Keep Moving…
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Santa:
Oye Eh Ta Theek Aa, Per Jana Kithe Hai?
Golu Cycle De Utte Ja Reha Si,
Raste Ch Ik Bhikhari Mileya, “Allah De Na Te Kuch De Davo…”
Golu Nu Tarash Aaya, “Chal Aa Cycle Te Bai, Tainu Garden Da Ik Chakkar De Devan.”
Question: Wo Kehdi Cheez Hai Jehdi Wife Apne Husband Nu Saari Umar Nai Lain Dindi?
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Hor Soch Lavo.
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Ans. – Sukh-Chain Di Saa… (Breath)
Wife Husband Nu Phone Karke Kehendi Hai: Hello, Jee Tusi Ki Karde Pye O?
Husband: Darling, Main Bahut Busy Han, Bada Kamm Hai Ajj Office Te?
Wife: Oho, Kinna Karna Painda Hai Tuhanu? Ajj Pata Laga?
Husband: Ki Kariye Sohniye, Karna Painda Hai? Tusi Ki Karde Ho?
Wife: Main Tuhade Peeche Table Te Han, Te Bacche Puch Rahe Ne Aa Daddy De Naal Kudi Kaun Aa…
Sarkari School De Bacche Kisi Nu
Ghaseet Ghaseet Ke School Lai Ke Ja Rahe San
IK Buzurag – Ehnu Shad Do Ae Aape School Aa Jayuga.
Bacche – Ae Student Nahi School Da Master Hai…
Kudi – Mainu Ik Eho Ja Husband Chahida Jehda Mithiyan-Mithiyan Gallan Kare,
Hansi Mazaak Kare
Aur Raatan Nu Mainu Geet Sunave…
Ghantu: Tu Fer FM Radio Naal Veyah Kara Le… :)
Ik Murakh Folak Samet Kela Kha Reha Si
Kisi Ne Keha, “Oye Bai, Avein Ni Khaida, Folak Laah Ke Khaida…”
Murakh: Folak Laahne Da Ki Faida, Mainu Changi Taran Pata Haiga,
Ehde Ander Kela Hi Hai Hor Kuch Ni Ho Sakda…
Santa: Oh Yaar Tu Ki Boli Janda Ae Mainu Nai Sunai Dinda?
Thodi Uchi Aawaz Ch Bol Taan Sunu…
Banta: Main Taan Bas Chewing Gum Chab Reha Haan… Tainu Ki Keha?
Ik Doctor Ne Chhote Jehe Operation De 5 Lakh Rupeye Mang Laye…
Mareej Sun Ke Hairani Naal Boleya: Daactar Ji, Inne Paise Naal Taan Operation Ki, Ik Navi Car Aa Jayu…
Doctor: Ohi Taan Laini Aan.
Ik Nikka Jeha Baccha Badi Der Ton Ghar De Bahar Khadeya Darwaje Di Ghanti Bajaan Di Kosish Kar Reha Si,
Ik Buda Banda: Ki Karda Peya Puttar?
Baccha: Uncle Maithon Eh Ghanti Ni Baj Ho Rahi.
Buda Banda (Ghanti Baja Ke): Ae Lai Baja Di Ghanti…
Baccha: Hun Bhajj Lo…
Santa Is Asked To Translate A Phrase In English:
“Dukh Hamesha Naal Rehnde Ne Per Khushi Aundi Jandi Rehendi Hai.”
Santa Translated It As: My Wife Is Always With Me But Her Sister Comes And Goes.
Wife: Oh Sweet Heart, Tusi Kinne Pyare Ho? Meri Photo Hamesha Apne Naal-Naal Rakhte Ho? I Love You…
Husband: Jad Vi Koi Problem Aundi Hai, Main Tuhadi Photo Dekh Lenda Han, Te Problem Solve Ho Jandi Hai.
Wife: So Nice, Tusi Dekhya Main Tuhade Layi Kinni, Lucky Han?
Husband: Jee Bilkul, Jad Vi Koi Problem Hundi Ae, Tuhadi Photo Dekh Ke Menu Oh Problem Vi Nikki Jehi Lagdi Hai, Sochda Han Ke Jad Aidi Problem Nu Jhalda Han, Eh Tan Kujh Vi Nhi…
1 Kanjoos Apne Bachchon Se Bola,
Jo Raat Ko Khana Nahi Hayega Use 5 Rs Dunga,
Bachche 5-5 Rs. Lekar So Gaye,
Subah Bola Jo 5-5 Rs. Dega Use Hi Khana Milega…
A Couple Had A Fight Whole Night…
Later Next Morning, Husband Offered A Glass Of Milk To His Wife.
Wife – You Are Sorry For Fighting With Me?
Husband – No… Today Is Nag Panchami,
Le Nagan Pee Lai.
Result Je Changa Hove:
Teacher: Hosiyar Jawak Hai
Maa: Rab Di Mehar Ho Gayi
Baapu: Putt Kihda Hai
Dost: Chal Daru Peen Chaliye…
Rusult Je Kharab Hove:
Teacher: Padhai Ch Dhiyan Ni Siga
Maa: Agg Lagge Es Mobile Nu
Baapu: Laadan Ne Bigaad Deya
Dost: Chal Daru Peen Chaliye…
Moral: Duniya Badal Jandi Hai Per Kade Dost Ni Badalde…
Arz Karda Haan,
Ohna Di Gali To Gujre
Taan Ohna Da Chobara Nazar Aaya,
Wah Ji Wah…
Ohda Baapu Bahar Aa Ke Boleya,
Hath Pair Tod Devanga, Je Fer Nazar Aaya…
Santa To Shopkeeper: Gora Karn Wali Creme Haigi, Tere Kol,
Shopkeeper: Haan Hai
Santa: Fer Saale Launda Kyun Ni, Teri Sakal Dekh Ke Main Roz Dar Janda Haan.
Ikk Majj Khote De Utte Chad Gayi
Khota: Ae Ki Kar Rahi Hain?
Majj Boli, Main Taan Majaak Kita Si…
Khota: Main Majaak Karanga Taa Panchaytan Kardi Firengi…
